Genre Conventions Research: G. I. Joe Review
Language:
I would preface my commentary with rider that the entire review is very, very funny and comedic in tone, making constant jokes at the film and filmmaker’s expense. There does not seem to be a serious tone to the review at all, and almost as if the reviewers feel that the film is not worth the time and effort it would take to conduct a fair and balanced critique of the film, it is just bad, pure and simple. This implies a bias, and possibly that the film reviewer’s job (in this case) is to make sure that films as terrible as these do not get seen, when other films, films which may not have as much hype as a film like this but are ten times better, are fairing very poorly at the box-office.
The review begins with a snub of the film: “At least three times during G.I. Joe, you will hear...‘Let’s get into the fight!!!’ Here, the three exclamation points are justifiable because it’s hard to imagine one or two would be enough.” This immediately sets the tone for the review, in that it will be full of disparaging remarks, and that it is a wholly negative critique and will not give the film any positive praise.
The reviewer then goes deeper into both the making of the film and the possible audience hype which is surrounding the film. Firstly, the reviewer states that: “The script...was rushed into production to beat the writer’s strike...” which possibly tries to imply that the messy pre-production was detrimental to the overall quality of the film. Secondly, he makes mention that the “Blogosphere', which obviously implies that this is the sort of film which will achieve much of its hype over the internet, and that the film’s success, if it does become a success, is heavily reliant upon the 'buzz' generated from the internet. Yet the comment that “Holy crap...G.I. Joe...is SHIT!” thereby eliminates the idea that even the Blogosphere will be able to save this film. Also, the use of the word “shit” implies that this is a laid back review, and that this film is so extremely bad that it warrants this use of profanity.
Then, we are given details as to how stupid and nonsensical this film actually is, by the reviewer giving us a summary of one of the film’s more “dramatic,” scenes: “Channing Tatum...riding about on a motorbike in anguish...in the rain...with sunglasses on.” This not only an example of the reviewer completely 'ripping' into the film, giving it no justice and bombarding the reader with one critique after another after another, but it is also an example of the humorous, laid-back, completely and totally honest quality of the reviewer’s writing skill.
The point is then made that this film is sort of a “so-bad-it’s-good,” kind of a film, in that, even though it “has a robot tuna...and such unashamed dumb-assedness...it still gained $100.5 mil...which is more than it deserves.” This infers that, despite all of the film’s flaws, and despite every bad thing that this film feature, it still managed to be successful at the box-office, and this in itself is possible a jibe at how even the most stupid and nonsensical films, when given the right amount of hype, even negative hype, make money.
Finally, the reviewer insinuates that the film is a complete misfire, judging by its “substandard special effects, the impression that the “cyber spacesuits...are being waved by a giant, invisible 9-year-old,” and that it makes references to James Bond and “wants to be Thunderball...but ends up being Die Another Die...A mess.” This is, arguably, the final nail in the coffin for this film. The reviewer concludes his article finally and completely by giving one snub after the other, giving no justice whatsoever to the film, implying that it is so bad and so full of wants and desires to be something that it is not that it just collapses under the weight of what it could be instead of what it actually is. Therefore, the review is cleverly structured by the reviewer in order to both start and end the review with negative points, possibly giving the audience no hope at all that this is anyway a remotely good film, and that they should just stay well away from it.
Layout:
Again, there is lots of use of black, orange and maroon, to stay in keeping with a particular motif/colour scheme which is associated with the reviews section of Empire magazine.The review is, like that of District 9, presented through the use of columns (one long, two medium sized and one short column), each which hold no more than 7 words per line. Again, conforming to a traditional journalistic discipline. The length of the review is very short (the film is only allowed one page in the magazine), almost to imply that there is nothing worthwhile to point out the film, except its extraordinarily bad points and to critique and pick fun out of it to the point of absolute ridiculousness.
Toward the bottom left hand corner, there is a quote from the main article, which reads (paraphrased): "The Mummy Returns had Zombie Pygmies...G.I. Joe has a robot tuna." This quote is, again, much bigger than the review from which it comes from, and this instantly catches our eye and makes us not only want to read the comment in context, but also make us marvel at the absolutely stupid and downright bizarre nature of the film, and this is possibly where the main hook of the film is - that the reviewers almost want us to see this film just to make us agree with them that it is as bad as they have concluded it is. The 'final nail in the coffin' is a small text box in the middle left hand corner of the still from the film, where it gives us three points of trivia about the film and its filmmakers.
In conclusion, it is evident that Empire layout each of their reviews in a very similar fashion to one another, possibly to create a sense of consistency and to not alienate or confuse their regular readers by constantly changing the way that their articles are laid out. Creating a sense of brand identity in its own way, by strictly conforming to a set layout, they will firstly draw more readers in with their thorough reviews and secondly, create a sense of comfort and, almost, anticipation in amongst regular, dedicated readers who wish to find out the magazine's opinion of these films.
Images:
The one image comprises a large single still from the film, which takes up a little more than half of the page, features two Ninja-like characters, one in black, the other in white, in the middle of a swordfight or duel. The use of this image, when taken in context of the review, possibly implies that this is the key/most interest scene of the film, and the type of scene that will possibly be used to pull an audience, and that this sort of scene is shown again and again in the film, and that there is no more to it then that - the image sums up the film in a nutshell (i.e., duels, swords, villains in cool costumes, fire, explosions, all action and little sense, etc).
Therefore, a common theme seen throughout Empire magazine is that the images that they use tend to either, on the one hand, sum up the entire film in one singular image, possibly acting as a signifier to audiences that this is the type of thing they will see in the film and that they can make their choice on seeing the film based on this image, or, on the other hand, to enhance the former effect, they point out the very best of the film, serving as a key audience attractor, and to possibly want to get audiences to see the film because of this amazing image and the effect that it had on their review.
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